ARE YOU KEEPING YOUR COVENANT
A little more investigative work led the officer to the boy’s accomplice: another boy about 100 yards beyond the radar trap with a sign reading “TIPS” and a bucket at his feet full of change.
WALKING WITH GOD
DO YOU HAVE AN IMPORTANT DECISION TO MAKE?
One of the company’s finest technicians was drafted and sent to boot camp. At the rifle range, he was given some instruction, a rifle, and bullets. He fired several shots at the target. The report came from the target area that all attempts had completely missed the target.
WATCH WHAT YOU SAY
After Christmas, a teacher asked her young pupils to write an essay on how they spent their holiday away from school.
A PLACE FOR THE HURTING
NO REPLAYS
JOHNS HOPKINS STUDY The National Institutes of Health has just released the results of a $200 million research study completed, under a Federal grant to Johns Hopkins. The new study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it. …
THE ‘NO EXCUSE’ SUNDAY
- Cots, for those who say Sunday is their only day for sleeping in.
- Eye drops, for those whose eyes are tired from watching too much TV the night before.
- Steel helmets, for those who say the roof will fall in if they go to church.
- Blankets, for those who say the building is too cold, and fans for those who say it’s too hot.
- Hearing aids, for those who say the pastor isn’t loud enough and ear plugs for those who say he shouts too much.
- Score cards, for those who like to count all the hypocrites
- Relatives, for those who say Sunday is their only day to be with the family.
- Lunch, for those who say they can’t attend church and make dinner, too.
- Trees and grass, for those who say they “see God in nature” – especially golf courses!
- Christmas poinsettias and Easter lilies, for those who wouldn’t recognize the church without them.
THINGS I’VE NOTICED ABOUT JESUS
“Money is not everything; but, it is the next thing to oxygen.”
FRIENDS WITH GOD
Late one night I stopped at one of those 24-hour gas station mini-marts to get myself a fresh-brewed cup of coffee. When I picked up the pot, I could not help noticing that the brew was as black as asphalt and just about as thick. “How old is the coffee you have here?” I asked the woman who was standing behind the store counter. She shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve only been working here two weeks.” …
THE OPEN DOOR POLICY
Teacher (pointing to the flag): “Amy, do you know what this is?” Amy: “Yes, it is the flag of our country.” Teacher: “Now, tell me the name of our country.” Amy: “‘Tis of Thee.” …